The Original College Football Czar

Week 3

Week two in review: The College Football Czar thought Oregon was a little overrated this year, but not that much. Last Saturday, the Fighting Ducks lost 39-31 to an Oklahoma State team that had: (a) not beaten a Division I-A opponent in almost two years; (b) gotten blown out by the Ducks 69-3 last season; and (c) just gotten stuffed by Tulsa 24-10, one week earlier. Alleged Heisman candidate Dante Moore misfired on his first seven passes for the quackers, finishing the game at 14-for-29. Not many years ago, that result would have meant UO was o-u-t of national championship contention, and the fact that it could now re-enter the picture with one quality win illustrates why the Czar has always opposed an extended playoff format.

In more bad news for the Big Ten, Texas stormed back from a 20-point fourth-quarter deficit to shock #1 Ohio State, 24-23. Normally, a one-point loss in Austin would hardly be considered much of a setback. But for the lumpy nuts to crack the way they did, allowing late touchdown drives of 91, 72 and 73 yards, suggests a problem that could come back to haunt them later this season, on October road trips to Indiana and USC.

The Czar went 14-6 in Week 2, coming within one point of the final scores of Missouri's 38-21 Friday night win over Kansas (predicted score 38-20) and UCLA's 21-10 victory over San Diego State (20-10). For the season, his record stands at 36-14, for a .720 winning percentage.

Sept. 18

Houston at Texas Tech

The Red Raider defense, which ranked third in the nation a year ago, yielded 413 passing yards in a 35-24 win over Oregon State, a game that had been tied 21-21 after three. They can't afford another performance like that this Friday against seasoned quarterback Connor Weigman of the Cougars.

The fact that Weigman left last year's loss to TT with an injury in the second quarter might make a reasonable excuse for the 35-11 defeat, except that UH already trailed 22-3 by the time he came off the field, and he had in fact turned the ball over twice, leading to ten points for the Raiders. He'll be back for this rematch, but Behren Morton, now a New England Patriot, will not be on the opposing sideline.

Tech plays in what was originally known as Clifford B. and Audrey Jones Stadium, but in the year 2000 the school sold the naming rights to SBC Communications, renaming it Jones SBC Stadium. Six years later, it became Jones AT&T Stadium, not to be confused with the AT&T Stadium in Arlington, which is the creation of somebody named Jones. As of this year, it is Galaxy Stadium, named after Galaxy Digital Inc., with the Jones name scrubbed from the title altogether. But wait a minute, the stadium had been named after the Joneses in exchange for their donation. Will the school now offer their estate a refund? Don't count on it. The moral of this story is do not donate money to a university.

Seriously. Those people don't even like you.

Houston 35, Texas Tech 31

Sept. 19

Buffalo at Penn State

The Cyclions continued to take over the PSU offense in a 27-9 trudge over Temple, with former Iowa State tight end Benjamin Brahmer leading the way. The senior snagged five passes from his old ISU quarterback Rocco Becht, for a career-high 79 yards and two touchdowns.

The Bulls were corralled in Coral Gables last Saturday against Florida International, in a performance that could hardly have been less manly if they had danced by the light of the moon. For the entire game, they rushed for only 59 yards on 25 carries, in a 33-20 loss that was already out of hand by halftime. UB has now lost eight consecutive nonconference road games since barely pulling out a 35-34 win at Old Dominion in 2021.

Buffalo ought to enjoy its trip to State College. It doesn't even have to bring its own snow.

Happily for the Nittany Lions, their nonconference schedule is about as weak as that gag.

Penn State 54, Buffalo 10

West Virginia vs. Virginia

These neighboring foes head south for this game in Charlotte, which happens to be where they last met in the 2002 Continental Tire Bowl, won by WVU in a 48-22 rout. That's the same game that is now known as the Duke's Mayo Bowl, except that the winning coach would rather have a tire dropped on his head than a barrel of mayonnaise. The College Football Czar is not crazy about neutral site regular season games, but at least when there's not really a home team, there are no Mussolini mini-mes from the university trying to dictate to the attendees what they must wear.

In Week Zero, the Cavaliers tricked Nc State into thinking their game was being played in Brazil, while they stayed at home at Charlottesville and kicked off. How else to explain the almost complete lack of opposition from NCSU during an unexpected 34-8 thumping? New QB Beau Pribula threw for 155 yards that day, and rushed for 110 more.

The Mountaineers think they might have as potent a dual threat of their own in ex-Oklahoma backup Michael Hawkinsjr, who played well in a limited role in 2024, but was never seriously considered as the starter for the Sooners. In this year's opener, he completed 11 of 14 for 132 yards and a TD, while also gaining 103 yards and another score on 20 carries. After building a 24-0 halftime lead against Coastal Carolina, however, he and his offense started the second half with three consecutive three-and-outs, letting CCU come back and throw a scare into them, 31-24.

If you've never heard of a continental tire, it's just like a continental breakfast except it's made of rubber. Football road trippers who have ever made the mistake of staying at a Days Inn can tell you all about it.

Virginia 31, West Virginia 21

LSU at Ole Miss

In the most anticipated game of the 2026 season, Tiger coach Lane Kiffin returns to the stadium he had called home for the past six years, until he abandoned the Rebels on their way into the playoffs so that he could take another job with an SEC rival. In Oxford, Kiffin collected 55 wins in 74 games, including a Peach Bowl victory over Penn State to finish the 2023 season. He is now 2-0 in Baton Rouge, having dispatched Clemson and Louisiana Tech by a combined score of 96-24.

Upon Kiffin's departure, Pete Golding rallied the Rebs to playoff victories over Tulane and Georgia, before falling to Miami in a seesaw semifinal. He has last year's starting QB Trinidad Chambliss and leading rusher Kewan Lacy back with him this year, and is off to a 2-0 start also. In a Week 1 neutral site game in Nashville, his team let a late two-TD lead slip away, but beat Louisville 41-38, on a last-second 48-yard field goal by Lucas Carneiro.

Louisiana State quarterback Sam Leavitt, who played last week's game against LTU in its entirety, has mysteriously been listed as doubtful for this pivotal contest. The College Football Czar will be very surprised if he doesn't play. Of course, there are penalties for misleading injury reporting, but as long as no details about the injury have to be released, it's pretty much impossible to enforce. "Doubtful" does not mean Leavitt won't play, so assuming he does play, that would not establish any kind of infraction. Ergo, the Czar is proceeding under the assumption that Kiffin is playing head games, and Leavitt will be in the lineup.

It's time once again to spin the Wheel O' Jagoffery, to see what Lane Kiffin is going to do next. Depending on where the wheel stops, the first-year Bayou Bengal coach might: (a) drive into the stadium in a truck and tear up the field by doing donuts at the 50-yard line; (b) crank call a local pizza shop and order a pizzas for each of the 68,000 people in attendance, all of them with anchovies; or (c) equip his players with pointed German helmets from World War One, and justify it by observing that there is no rule explicitly forbidding it. The only way to find out which is to tune in to ABC at 7:30 Saturday night.

Disney really ought to pay the College Football Czar for this stuff. A free subscription to ESPN Unlimited, at least.

LSU 30, Ole Miss 25

SMU at Louisville

The Mustangs took Labor Day literally, as they made themselves work a little too hard to beat Florida State, 27-24 to wrap up Week 1. They statistically dominated the Seminoles in most facets of the game, except for turnovers, where they were minus-3.

Cardinal fans should be concerned that quarterback Lincoln Kienholz is leading the team in rushing through two games. Last year's leader, RB Isaac Brown, is down from an 8.8 yard per carry average in 2025 to 3.3, in a pair of subpar performances against Ole Miss and Division I-AA Villanova.

Southern Methodist has won all four previous games between these teams, but last year's 38-6 romp was an aberration. Not only were both running backs Issac and Keyjuan Brown injured for that game, but so was QB Miller Moss. This year's meeting, with their offense intact, should more closely resemble the 34-27 scrap they put up two years ago.

The team from Dallas does not pronounce the name of its school "smoo." If it did, it could give the people of Louisville oo lessons.

SMU 28, Louisville 23

Florida State at Alabama

Unfortunately for the Crimson Tide, the transfer portal has deprived them of a shot at revenge against Tommy Castellanos. The FSU quarterback, who is now the backup at Texas Tech, put down the pachyderms during the buildup to the game, and then made them stay down on game day. The 31-17 upset did not alter the trajectory of either team for the season, as Bama rallied its way to a series of wins over ranked teams and ultimately a playoff berth, and the Seminoles struggled to a 5-7 finish.

The Tide were terrible on the ground last season, finishing next to last in the SEC with 104.1 rushing yards per game, and no single back gaining more than 504 yards all season. In two games so far in 2026, and both of those against Division I-A competition, they are averaging 191.0. Daniel Hill, a holdover from 2025, has improved his per-carry average by almost two yards.

Florida State athletic director Michael Alford was fired this week, which is an ominous sign for coach Mike Norvell, whose 8-18 record over the past two-plus years would have gotten a lot of his predecessors fired by previous ADs in Tallahassee. Then again, dismissing Alford might just have seemed like the easier option, since the school didn't have to buy him out for $45 million.

Memo to all the "it's all about da munny" lardheads out there: Yes, coaching salaries are all about the money. You nailed it. Keep up the good work.

Alabama 27, Florida State 10

Arizona State vs. Kansas

This inaugural Union Jack Classic is the first-ever college football game played in England, where the NFL by now has become as common as rain. Kickoff is at noon Eastern Time on FS1, so fans of the college game can kick back and enjoy a few bottles of Newky Brown and, oh, probably a boiled sheep's bladder, or something.

It's a good thing this game has got the novelty factor going for it, because the matchup itself would not generate a lot of excitement after last week's action. The Jayhawks were hammered by Missouri in the second half of a 38-21 loss last Friday night, and on Saturday, the Sun Devils were torn asunder by Texas A&M, 48-20.

This is not ASU's first overseas football game. In early December of 1990, they lost the Coca-Cola Classic in Tokyo to Houston, 62-45. Opposing QB David Klingler threw for 716 yards, but the game was too late to help him in the Heisman balloting, and his 10-1 Cougars were bowl-ineligible because of recruiting violations. Guess they showed him.

American fans have been preparing for the trip by learning how to speak British. For example, an Englishman might refer to Harry and Meghan as "toffee-nosed gits," which is far more polite that what we call them over here.

Arizona State 44, Kansas 30

Florida at Auburn

On paper, this is a great series, with the Tigers leading 43-39-2. But in this era of megaloconferences, these evenly matched, longtime rivals from neighboring states have only met four times in twenty years. When are the people in charge of college football going to realize that maintaining rivalries is lucrative? The problem is not that the game is "all about da munny" these days, but just that it is more stupidly so than it used to be.

Each team is 2-0, but the Tigers have a 17-16 victory over Baylor to their credit, whereas the Gators are virtually untested. In that win against the Waco kids, new AU slinger Byrum Brown threw no touchdown passes and three interceptions, although he did provide the winning score on an 11-yard scamper.

The Gators buried the Burrowing Owls in their opener, 66-21, an outcome that looks more impressive now that FAU has gone on to knock off American Conference favorite Navy. Jon Sumrall's team scored on every one of its eleven possessions that day, in his first game since being hired away from Tulane.

Jordan-Hare ought to be the name of a basketball fieldhouse instead of a football stadium, because it sounds like it was named after that famous athletic duo of Michael Jordan and Bugs Bunny. Those two made a far better team as athletes than they did as actors, because unlike Bugs, Michael is certainly not an Oscar winner. As we remember from his Hanes commercials, he is totally incapable of acting like himself. Or like somebody who buys his own underwear. Or like somebody who is even mildly tolerant of the presence of other people. Oh, well. At least he has never tried to act like a rapping genie, and for that, the College Football Czar thanks him.

Auburn 13, Florida 10

North Carolina at Clemson

Hours before this installment of picks was posted, Bill Belichick's son Steve, the defensive coordinator, announced his resignation. He did this in response to an internal investigation that concluded, according to a statement from the university, that "certain actions demonstrated a disregard for Carolina's values and standards of conduct." This can't help but be a distraction for the head coach, but it should not affect the team's defensive performance, because Steve has already been absent on medical leave since before the season opener.

The College Football Czar is not convinced that the Tar Heels are for real in Coach Belichick's second season, but they might not need to be against this already tired-looking Tiger team. Things have gotten thorny for the Paw Boys early, with a 51-10 pummeling at the hands of LSU. They did win their second game, 22-7 over Georgia Southern, but their 10 penalties for 100 yards contributed to a sluggish offensive effort, in which they converted only 2 of 14 third downs.

Son of Clem quarterback Christopher Vizzina left that game with an elbow injury, but the greater concern continues to be the ground game. Through two games, the RBs have combined for only 150 rushing yards and one touchdown.

In an opening 15-10 win over TCU in Dublin, the Heels stopped the Horned Frogs three times on fourth-down conversion attempts, two of those inside the 10-yard line. On the other hand, the reason that was so important was that they never reached the end zone themselves during the last three quarters of a game that had been tied 10-10 after one.

If Michael Jordan tried to act like a UNC alumnus, he wouldn't be able to pull that off, either.

North Carolina 20, Clemson 14

Colorado at Northwestern

An opening 14-13 road win over Georgia Tech was big for the Buffaloes, but it might not translate into success against a very different opponent in Evanston. It's tough to tell much about the Wildcats from a 34-18 struggle against perennial Division I-AA powerhouse South Dakota State, but new offensive coordinator Chip Kelly, quarterbacks coach Jerry Neuheisel and QB Aidan Chiles promise a far greater challenge to Deion's defense than it got from the Ramblin Wreck two weeks ago.

The new Ryan Field won't open until a Week 5 game against Penn State, so this game will be played at 12,000-seat Martin Stadium, which is a shame considering the size of the crowd it could have had. Coach Prime hasn't performed for so small an audience since he was on the Blue Jays' triple-A team in Syracuse in 2001. At that time, he could have dumped water on somebody's head and nobody would have seen it, so he'd have to tell us himself how witty it was.

Some observers think Jerry Neuheisel doesn't look like he belongs on a college football sideline, but where else would you find someone who looks like a pom-pom with a face?

Northwestern 29, Colorado 26

Tulane at Kansas State

TU can probably wave goodbye to the CFP for this season, at least. After being stifled by Duke 17-3, the Green Wave spotted South Alabama an early 10-0 lead. Former Ball State QB Kadin Semonza finally threw his first touchdown pass of the season with 1:17 left in a 28-24 escape.

When these teams met in New Orleans in 2024, the Wave receded in the fourth quarter after leading for most of the game. They gave up the go-ahead touchdown on a 60-yard fumble return, and then failed to tie it up again when a TD catch was nullified by an offensive pass interference penalty, apparently for running a pick.

The Wildcat defense whitewashed Washington State, whose only score in the 34-7 stomping came on an interception return. In shutting out the Cougar offense, K-State allowed only 166 total yards, and no more than 16 on any individual play.

You might wonder why an angry wave would carry a megaphone. That's so he can put opponents to sleep by surrounding them with tranquil sounds of the ocean.

And if that doesn't work, he'll try disrupting their feng shui.

Kansas State 25, Tulane 14

Nc State at Vanderbilt

Welcome back to old-time Vanderbilt football, in which the Commodores find themselves scrapping through competitive games against the likes of Delaware and Division I-AA Austin Peay. Last Saturday, they staved off the Fighting Blue Hens 35-26, in a game in which the teams were separated by only one yard in total offense. No doubt, they are missing brash quarterback Diego Pavia, who was offensive as far his yardage and scoring totals were concerned, as well as being offensive in a Lane Kiffin sort of a way.

Vandy has tried to recreate its Heisman candidate by going with another New Mexico State transfer, Blaze Berlowitz, at quarterback. Freshman Jared Curtis will get his first career start this Saturday, however, after performing well off the pine last week against UD.

The Wolfpack put the arachnids on the rack, as they pointlessly tortured the Division I-AA Richmond Spiders, 73-0. If that was supposed to balance off the dismal display they put on against conference foe Virginia, it didn't. Suffice it to say that their remaining opponents are much closer to the caliber of UVa than Richmond, so they better have enjoyed that sadistic pleasure while it lasted.

The Commodores are named after naval officers, and they use an anchor as an alternate logo, even though they are in a landlocked state. Tuffy the Strutting Wolf will be very disappointed to learn that. All dressed up in a sailor hat, and nowhere to go.

Nc State 30, Vanderbilt 18

Mississippi State at South Carolina

The 2-0 Gamecocks have outscored their opponents by a combined total of 102-9, which is a lot less meaningful once you realize that the opponents were Kent State and Division I-AA Towson. Such is September college football in the 2020s.

Carolina has lost five SEC games in a row, going back to last October. However, those were against ranked opponents LSU, Oklahoma, Alabama, Ole Miss and Texas A&M. This 2026 conference home opener against the mud puppies is not nearly as foreboding.

Bulldog running back Fluff Bothwell mussed Minnesota for 113 yards and two touchdowns on only 18 carries, in a 38-13 runaway. So few teams have played competitive games so far, and also looked good in them, that this rout of the radiant rodents is putting a few more butts on board the MSU bandwagon.

You can tell when you're on the MSU bandwagon because nobody ever has to call for more cowbell.

Mississippi State 34, South Carolina 23

Troy at Missouri

Tiger wide receivers Donovan Olugbode (6-2, 220) and Cayden Lee (5-11, 180) are far from identical, but each of them had six receptions and a touchdown in a 38-21 win at Kansas last Friday, with Olugbode picking up 121 yards, and Lee 120.

These have been more familiar foes than one might have guessed. Since TSU joined the ranks of Division I-A in 2001, they have gone 1-3 against the Tigers, most recently getting trampled 42-10 in 2019. The lone Trojan victory came in a nationally televised Thursday night game in 2004, when they rallied from an early 14-0 deficit to stun a ranked Mizzou team, 24-14.

The Old College Troy wanted to take the occasion of that ESPN audience to showcase itself as an "international university," which is why there were people waving flags of different nations interspersed with the crowd that stormed the field at the end of the game. Most conspicuous among these was one banana-brain who was energetically waving a Red Chinese flag in a corner of the end zone. At the time, the College Football Czar was watching at home, and hoping the Bluesmobile would come and run that person out of the stadium.

"I hate Alabama Commies."

Missouri 27, Troy 17

Virginia Tech at Maryland

They must be going nuts for Cashewhead in Blacksburg, because the former Penn State coach won his first real game with VT, and he did it in a decisive beating of pesky intrastate rival Old Dominion, 44-21. His schedule gives him a chance to build up plenty of good will before things get nasty for him in November, with games against SMU, Miami and Virginia.

QB Ethan Grunkemeyer (formerly of Penn State, of course) threw two touchdown passes while rolling up a career-high 327 yards. That mark easily surpasses his previous best of 260, which he had set two games earlier, in the Pinstripe Bowl against Clemson.

The 2-0 Terrapins took apart Uconn last week, 38-14 on the road. Old Dominion transfer Na'eem Abdul Rahim Gladding (henceforth known on these pages as NARG) led the way with a career-high 130 yards and a touchdown on eight receptions.

Franklin used to be an assistant with Maryland, when he worked for head coach Ralph Friedgen, a.k.a., The Fridge. His job was to turn the little light off whenever the door was closed. Hey, somebody's got to do it. Well, not really, because how would anyone know?

Virginia Tech 33, Maryland 20

East Carolina at Old Dominion

The circle of life came back to bite the lion kings in their royal arse, when frequent victim Virginia Tech got its vengeance by throwing 34 points on the board in the first half. Meanwhile, the Monarch offense got manhandled for seven sacks and seven additional tackles for loss.

A week after a tough opening 48-10 loss at Alabama, the Pirates hosted intrastate foe Appalachian State in a game that gave them a great chance to turn things around. That is, until they missed a 33-yard field goal on the opening possession of the game. Later in the first half, they fumbled the ball away at their own 12-yard line, leading to an ASU go-ahead touchdown. In the third quarter, they lost yardage on back-to-back possessions, and in the fourth, they were intercepted while trying to mount a comeback. A last-minute TD was just enough to magnify all the mistakes that had previously been made in the 27-24 defeat. On the bright side, they've still got more than enough weak opposition in front of them to pull themselves out of their 0-2 hole and back into the postseason.

New ECU quarterback Mitch Griffis has not seen a great deal of action on the field during his six-season, seven-year collegiate career, which started at Wake Forest before a stop last season at Texas Tech. So, we still don't really know if he can walk the walk, but at least he can talk tough. That's because his last name ends with a reverse-lisp.

East Carolina 16, Old Dominion 13

UAB at La.-Lafayette

One of the many untrue things that is taken as axiomatic in sports is that there is no such thing as a moral victory. The Ragin Cajuns never really threatened USC last week, but to have competed as well as they did in a 49-30 loss on a long road trip to the Coliseum is likely to be looked back upon as the highlight of their season. Their quarterback, named Lunch, et that of the Trojan defenders, as he completed 16 of 22 for 212 yards and a touchdown, and also rushed for 91 yards and two scores.

The 1-1 Blazers had to battle back from behind against the belligerent birds of Louisiana-Monroe, chipping away at a 20-10 second-half deficit to finally prevail by a final of 26-20. Senior kicker Jonah Delange was called on to kick four mid-range field goals, and hit them all, making him 7-for-7 on the young season.

Unlike that thing about moral victories, one saying that is absolutely true is that there is no free lunch. If the Cajuns are going to keep QB Lunch Winfield at ULL for his senior year, it's going to cost them.

La.-Lafayette 45, UAB 29

Temple at Toledo

In a 27-9 loss to Penn State, the Owls were able to prevent the game from getting out of hand by establishing a good ground game, gaining 176 yards on 33 attempts, for a 5.3 yard per carry average. The game was only tied 3-3 until they finally let PSU take the lead with two minutes to go before halftime.

Considering that the Rockets lost a large percentage of last year's team to Uconn along with head coach Jason Candle, they acquitted themselves well in an opening 30-20 loss at Michigan State (although depending on who you are in Toledo, an acquittal may or may not be something to celebrate). Former Mercer head coach Mike Jacobs is now 1-1 at UT, after a silly 63-10 romp over Division I-AA Central Connecticut.

Believe it or not, these teams once played to a sellout crowd, back in 1984. The catch is that the game was held at the Atlantic City Convention Center, with a capacity of just over 7,000, or one tenth the size of Lincoln Financial Field. So, it was kind of like those stories we read years ago about Nike selling out of limited-edition Colin Kaepernick jerseys in record time. Seriously, have you ever seen anybody wearing a Comrade Kaep jersey? All they needed to do in order to produce that deceptive story was to deliberately generate an insufficient supply of the product.

Just wait until we start getting the stories about how Barnes & Noble can't keep his new book in stock, because both copies have already been sold.

Temple 20, Toledo 13

Florida International at Florida Atlantic

These natural rivals entered Division I-A on equal terms in 2004, but FAU has since elevated itself to the American Conference, while FIU is left wallowing in Conference USA. The Don't-Call-Us-Golden Panthers did win last year's game in Coral Gables, 38-28, but that snapped a seven-game winning streak for the Burrowing Owls, who now hold a commanding 15-6 lead in the series.

Zach Kittley's club was owl over Navy 38-7, but then they gave up three touchdowns and a safety before the clock finally ran out on the Midshipmen, for a final of 38-30. Fifth-year former Western Kentucky QB Caden Veltkamp fired five TD passes with no interceptions, while completing 27 of 32 for 386 yards, and still it almost wasn't enough.

The International Men of Mystery have been fittingly enigmatic so far. They opened by losing to a pretty good South Florida team, though not very badly, and then they beat a pretty bad Buffalo team, but not very impressively, so they're still basically a blank slate at this point in the season.

Panther quarterback J.J Kohl is on his third team in three seasons, having already played at Iowa State and Appalachian State. Unfortunately, he gets his NIL in Kohl's Cash, and he has yet to find a home stadium beer stand that will let him use it.

Florida Atlantic 37, Florida International 24

Wyoming at Central Michigan

If there were relegation in college football, this might be considered an elimination game from Division I-A, as each team was beaten badly in its opening game, and then barely survived its second game against a lower-division opponent, Wyoming edging Northern Colorado 21-13 and CMU sneaking past Colgate 13-10.

The Cowboys are 2-1 all-time against the Chippewas, but they lost on their only previous trip to Mt. Pleasant in 2002. They won the most recent matchup, however, at the 2017 Famous Idaho Potato Bowl, by a final of 37-14. What was memorable about that game was that quarterback Josh Allen was nursing a hamstring injury, but never gave any consideration to abandoning his teammates in order to "prepare for the draft." Instead, he threw three first-quarter TD passes to stake his team to a big early lead, and then gritted his way through the rest of the game, thereby improving his draft prospects, unlike many others who have sat their bowl games out. The moral of the story is that football players play football. Those who opt out are only showing NFL scouts that they're afraid to play a football game. That's not very good preparation for the draft.

The Chipps' home stadium is another example of donor disrespect. Originally named Perry Shorts Stadium after a generous alumnus, the building was renamed Kelly/Shorts Stadium in 1972, as a partial tribute to former coach Bill Kelly. As has sadly become customary, the school has recently christened the playing surface as if it were an entity apart from the stadium, naming it after two more coaches, Roy Kramer and Herb Deromedi. What exists now is officially named Kramer/Deromedi Field at Kelly/Shorts Stadium, except that nobody seriously calls it that. This defeats the entire purpose of a dedication. A fraction of an honor is no honor at all, and besides, this is not a good enough program to have three ex-coaches who are worthy. If they had been, then the school would be able to sell the naming rights, and the building would now be called something comparatively unstupid like Froot Loops Stadium.

There is actually a town called Wyoming about 90 miles from the stadium, although the Pokes are obviously not from there. In fact, they weren't even aware that anybody wyomed around these parts.

Central Michigan 15, Wyoming 12

The College Football Czar

a sports publication from The Shinbone